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Anyway, I grab my coffee and head back to the office. I’m feeling a bit better, but then I get a call from a client. They’re freaking out about their taxes. I’m like, “Dude, it’s not the end of the world!” But they’re panicking like it’s a zombie apocalypse. I try to calm them down, but it’s like talking to a brick wall.
Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty, half-drunk, “I drink and I know things.” So, sexual-massage, eh? Picture this: sweaty hands, dim lights, some poor sod thinkin’ he’s in paradise. I’ve seen brothels in King’s Landing with less tension! Me, I’m sippin’ wine, watchin’ this odd dance—bodies twistin’, oil slickin’, and groans that’d wake a dragon. Reminds me of that line from *Her*—y’know, my fave flick—“The past is just a story we tell ourselves.” Ain’t that the truth? Folks payin’ good coin to rewrite their lonely nights with a rubdown.
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